Ask a lamppost what it thinks about blogs.

There was this bad wreck in front of our apartment the other night. By bad, I mean that both cars were totaled and undriveable but no one was hurt. THANK HEAVENS! Right?

It was spooky, that wreck. When we heard it, it just … kept going. We heard three different impacts and we thought it was a pile up of some kind or that someone had gone all PCP and was just smashing into vehicles for the hell of it. When we looked out of our living room window all we could see was one, old four door SUV facing across two lanes that promptly floored it and ran RIGHT into our building. You read that correctly. The car seemed to floor it and run right into our building. Matt and I stood there for a second and thought, “Really?”

We ran down to see if anyone was hurt and there was a cabbie smashed into a light pole so hard his trunk was buckled up so far he couldn’t see out of the front window. He was limping but swore he was fine. How he walked away from that with both legs I will never know.

The gal driving the SUV was tiny. She was 5 feet tall and 90 pounds soaking wet. As we looked around the intersection we couldn’t quite tell how the wreck had happened. It was only the two cars. We originally thought it was at least a four car pile up. No kidding. It was just the two. One poor car had gotten hit that was parked on the road. And then of course … my poor apartment building that was doing nothing at all to provoke such an attack.

Oh, and the best story is this: A young guy came walking up and had this odd look on his face like he maybe thought he was walking in a dream. He said, “You’re not gonna believe this but I’m just walking back to my apartment from moving my car. It was parked right here.” Right here was where the SUV had just barreled over to then hit the building. Meaning, there was an empty space through which the SUV traveled in order to hit the building and five minutes prior to that there had been a car parked there. Oh man. What? Wow. He won the prize for luckiest car that night. Had he been parked there, his car would have been totaled, no doubt. However, my poor building would have been spared.

But what was more astounding than ALL OF THAT … was that I ran down to see if I could help and I had crazy hair, no make up and was wearing my pajama bottoms. I mean … what? Thank GOD I still had a bra on. If anything could have drawn attention from that wreck, it would have been me all crazy haired in PJ bottoms with a T-shirt and no brazziere. I think the cops might even have arrested me had that been the case. You know … for being offensive.

Listen, I am sort of thrilled that I not only went down to check on the drivers of the cars, but then stayed down there and chatted with neighbors for … oh … half an hour WITHOUT MAKEUP AND HAIR! Cuz you know what? I often won’t go downstairs to our mailbox without makeup and hair. But while being sort of thrilled I am also sort of mortified. I am gonna run into these people again. Right? They are my neighbors. And forever, when they look at me, they will see crazy bag lady, pajama bottom person who lives in number four.

You never get a second chance to make a first impression. At least I came off like I’m someone who cares about injured drivers so much she doesn’t care if she’s ratty. Right?